Coping with Alcohol – Friend or Foe?

Is coping with alcohol friend or foe? During springtime, I take a more focused look at alcohol and the impact it can have because April is Alcohol Awareness Month. Alcohol, in itself, is not really the problem; it is when someone abuses it or becomes alcohol dependent to cope that it becomes an issue. Many individuals use alcohol socially and if you are over 21 it is legal to do so. Over the years I have heard many people express confusion about what exactly is the difference between social drinking and alcohol abuse.

Alcohol – Friend or Foe?

 
 

 

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Social drinking is when an individual consumes alcohol and there are no adverse consequences as a result of their behaviors from drinking such as legal issues, relationship conflicts, hurting oneself or others, financial, work or school issues. Many people have used alcohol to acknowledge a celebration or for religious purposes. Social drinkers drink responsibly.

Social drinking is not getting intoxicated. The liver breaks down alcohol approximately one drink per hour and so to become intoxicated the liver has to be “overdosed” to feel the effects of intoxication and that harms the body. According to the Dietary Guidelines for Americans, moderate alcohol consumption is defined as 2 drinks per day for men and 1 drink per day for women (because women metabolize alcohol differently than men) and is not intended as a guide to drink daily.

My Opinion: Is Coping with Alcohol Friend or Foe?

I do not have any particular feelings about alcohol as a friend or foe, one way or the other. I am more concerned with individuals who try coping with alcohol and have problems because of it. The purpose of establishing April as Alcohol Awareness Month is to provide education and raise awareness about the repercussions of excessive drinking. A report released by the NIAAA (National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism) revealed there are an estimated 18,000,000 individuals with an alcohol disorder and a societal cost of over $225 billion per year. There are approximately 80,000 alcohol-related deaths per year, and in comparison to breast cancer fatalities, which is about half of that, it clearly makes it a medical issue as well as a tremendous financial burden on our society.

The disease of alcoholism has a characteristic connected to it that is typically not associated with other illnesses and that is the issue of stigma. Many people view alcoholics as being weak-willed or having a lack of morals and common sense rather than being sick. This is because alcoholism so adversely affects the brain that unbelievable behaviors can manifest as a result of impaired thinking, which does not usually happen with other illnesses. Behaviors that make no sense and people tend to judge those actions rather than a person’s intentions.

When teaching classes for individuals who have received two or more DWI’s I will often pass out this poem that I ran across many years ago. It usually provokes some food for thought and can help one to understand that they are not a bad person, but that alcohol (when abused) can cause bad behaviors and create a variety of unwelcome outcomes. It helps them answer the question is Alcohol – Friend or Foe?

Developing an understanding that there isn’t a cure for addiction/alcoholism allowed me to stop searching for that “magic answer” that was going to make it all go away and things would go back to normal or that the person would be cured. The only way an addict or alcoholic makes a healthy lifestyle that can last is when they get ready to do what they need to do to make it happen. They may have to experience a lot of pain and misery, but most of the time those are the experiences that motivate a person to change. With hard work and commitment, recovery is possible if they want it. In the meantime, the family members can learn to reclaim their lives and their happiness and they do not have to wait until the addict gets clean in order for that to happen.

Alcohol’s Disastrous Promise

    I have some promises I’ll make to you If you will do what I want you to do. The more you consume of me the more will your losses be. Here are the promises to you I make And I promise the promises never to break.
    I promise to take your money, your home, And all you can get in the way of a loan. I’ll take your character, your reputation too, Your good name, I’ll take from you. Your friends I’ll take from you one day Your family from you I’ll turn away.
    I’ll take your car, I’ll take your wealth I’ll take your job, I’ll take your health. It’ll cause you to stay out in the rain. I’ll take your credit, I’ll take your bail I’ll cause you to sleep in a dirty jail.
    • I’ll cause you regret, remorse, and pain I’ll cause your name to go down in

shame.

    I’ll bring you misery, I’ll bring you woe I’ll bring you trouble more than you know. I’ll take your clothes and pawn them too. The necessities of Life, I’ll take from you.
    I’ll take from you the days, I’ll take from you the years I’ll double the flow of your bitter tears. I’ll take your heart, give you one of stone I’ll cause you to walk through life alone. I’ll take away your desires to live aright Your light of day, I’ll turn to night.
    I’ll cause you to dishonor your mother and dad I’ll take away all the pleasure you could have had. I’ll turn your love for your friends to hate Your desire to repent will come too late. Your road to despair for you I’ll pave I’ll cause you to fill a premature grave.
    I’ll put you in an institution for the insane Your normal thinking will go down the drain. I’ll cause you to murder your very best friend I’ll trouble your mind to the very end. I’ll bring you contention, I’ll bring you strife I’ll finish with you by taking your life……..
    Author Unknown

People who have a serious drinking problem and the family members who are affected by it can relate to this poem. Luckily for us, in this day and age, there is hope and there is help. How do you answer the question: Alcohol a Friend or Foe?

About the Author

Angie Carter, CRADC, SAP is a certified reciprocal alcohol and drug counselor and DOT certified Substance Abuse Professional. She is in private practice at Carter Counseling & Consulting Services. Angie sees local clients in the office and is also available for telephone coaching and/or consultation. Click here to contact Angie with appointment requests, questions, or feedback.


Make an Appointment With Don

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Don Carter CEO/Psychotherapist, Carter Counseling & Coaching Services
Don Carter, MSW, LCSW, CCTP, CCTP-II is an Integrative Psychotherapist and Certified Complex Trauma Professional at Levels 1 & 2, A graduate of the University of Missouri School of Social Work and trained by former Harvard professor, Dr. Janina Fisher Ph.D, Don's primary specialty areas include emotional, physical, and sexual abuse trauma, addictions, codependency, mood disorders, C-PTSD, and Adult/Child Syndrome. Don offers in-office and online counseling and coaching services and is licensed in Missouri.